To Throw or Not To Throw

I believe there are two types of moms in the world--those that like to throw birthday parties and those that don't.

I fall into the second group.

Birthday parties stress me out and I don't enjoy planning or hosting them, so early on in my motherhood career I decided that my kids would only have parties on their 8th, 12th, and 16th birthdays.

Well, Ephram turns 12 this year so he gets a birthday party.

And it was today.

And I still don't like birthday parties.

What is it about birthday parties that stresses me out? I can't really put my finger on it. I think it's the idea of entertaining a bunch of kids for 2 hours. Will they like the games and activities? What if one kid doesn't want to play and causes a ruckus or is bored or doesn't have fun? What if I don't plan enough for them to do? Is organized chaos better than chaos? AAAAK!

watermelon birthday cake

I learned something today though. Most kids know how to have fun and just want to hang with their friends--it doesn't really matter what activity is going on. Most kids are good sports and don't care if a game is lame. Most kids will eat any party food that is put in front of them and not complain. I finally had to stop worrying and enjoy the party.

All that being said. . .I think there are few things a mom who doesn't like to throw birthday parties can do to have a less-stressful party.

1. Use Pinterest. BUT don't feel like you have to be a "Pinterest mom". I love the all ideas that I can find on Pinterest, but I always simplify what I find. There is  no way I am going to spend bazillions of dollars and hours of time to create something that will last for less than 4 hours. AND probably not even be noticed by a bunch of 12 year old boys. Don't feel like you have to keep up with the other moms. Keep it simple.

2. Keep the cost manageable by playing free games, preparing simple food, and getting supplies at the dollar store. Some of the funnest games we played were traditional party games. The boys giggled like girls when they played Pin the Tail on the Donkey. We also played some Minute to Win-it Games and a few other games suggested on Pinterest using supplies I had at home. And, even though the weather was hot, the boys spent some time outside doing their own (unplanned) thing.

For food we did frozen pizzas (on sale at Frys), carrots and chips with homemade lemonade (frozen from last winter). I like to provide food because that is an activity that is easy to plan and takes up a big chunk of the party time. Other simple food ideas: DIY pizzas, sandwiches or wraps, hot dogs, pastas, or sliders.

Instead of party favors, Ephram requested that we have prizes for the games. He picked out prizes from the dollar store and let the game winners choose one.

3. Plan the games and activities with your birthday child. They know best what kids that age like to do. Even after all your Pinterest searching, they will probably  have a few more good ideas.

Also, over plan. Because one of my fears is running out of things for the guests to do, I make sure to have an over abundance of activities. We don't have to do all of them, but I like to have something planned in case they go through them quickly.

4. Create a list. I'm not talking about a check list/to-do list. I'm talking about a schedule and idea list. I wrote down all the things I wanted to happen at the party and all the extra game ideas and posted it on the wall for easy reference. The list helped me make sure I had all the supplies for each game and it was a reminder of the games we planned.

5. Last, and maybe the most important--CHILL OUT! It's hard to have fun when you are stressed and worried. I used oils and lot of re-framing to help me relax. So, sit back and enjoy the smile on your birthday child's face.

do you open presents? the guests wanted to see Ephram open their gifts.

After everyone left and I was cleaning up, I expressed my embarrassment over one of the pizzas being soggy and the lemonade tasting like sugar water. Ephram said "It doesn't matter mom. The party was fun! Thanks!" I guess that equals success.